And This Baby’s FULLY Paid For
Posted on May 23, 2008

According to my lovely wife, Heather, we have paid the final payment to the birthing center where we exchanged her distended stomach and ~$10,000.00 for a small human named Riley.
The expensive, tiny, useless and quivering thing has slowly inflated with flesh and has been gaining new powers and abilities day by day. Above, you can see her kicking cute little shoes while bearing a glowing, wide open smile and twinkly little eyes. And now that she’s paid for–free and clear–I no longer feel a bitter edge of regret while fighting the urge to hug her and kiss her widdle cheeks.




Comments
Congrats,
Isn’t usually something has just been paid off that they end up having to go into the shop which, of course, costs a fortune. I hope you got the extended warranty.
she’s gorgeous, sugar! looks like she’ll be a good investment, too
xo
‘Gaining new powers’? What are we talking about here? Flight? Super-strength? The ability to do long division?
Rich: I have some insurance, and it covers quite a bit. Hopefully none of the various malfunctions exempted from coverage occur.
savannah: I agree. Who else will bother to give a shit about us when we’re old?
Davecat:So far: animal mimicry, mass quantity consumption, spontaneous manifestation of foul-smelling waste material, infectious and un-ironic grinning, and sweaty feet.