Phases of Societal Views on Children Part 2
In the first part of this series, we covered the initial 328 phases of Societal Views on the Relative Merits and Imagery Both Spoken and Un-Spoken in Western Society and Humans In Particular. This is certainly in no way related to recent work by L>T on related subjects, and any dispursions to that effect will be enthusiastically lied about in private.
Part II: The Three Final Phases of Historical Societal Views on Children:
The three remaining for your consideration are the phases Crescent, New and Full.
 In Crescent, children appear in CopperTone sunblock ads, in which part of their posterior (i.e. “Crescent”) is exposed by ravenous dogs. Also at this time is a prevalence of animated features in which babies with wings create erotic tendancies in humans by bombarding them with primitive projectiles. These Cupids figured much more prominently in the “New” phase. |
 In the New phase, children are introduced to the public as not only the product of lust and carnal activities but also as the progenitors of such behaviour. Women, mooning after the offspring of their fellow females, immediately attack their male counterparts with the idea of procreation in mind. Also associated are the children’s choir groups, “New Edition” and “New Kids on the Block”. |
 In Full, modern man has transcended his original design and deigns to modify his offspring into more easthetically pleasing, and circular, forms. Force-feeding of high fat cheeses, beefs, butter soaked breads and other human inflational agents along with the mandatory adoption of sedentary patterns of activity marked by attention to animated features (see “Crescent”) and hand-eye coordination exercises involving automobile combat and prostituticide result in an unprecedented display of pre-pubescent girth. |
Which brings us to the present(tm).
Posted in Uncategorized by SafeTinspector on April 18th, 2007 |
9 comments
Well… nope, nothing came to mind. I felt the need to comment.
I’m not sure which is more tragic… the world view of kids as espoused by coppertone, Virginia Tech, or your Nekkid Dance Dance Revolution leg…
I should make sure I come here more often, if only to abuse you for the NSYNC image!
‘beefs’
Yep SafeT’s back, wherever he went I dunno, but he didn’t leave the word verification there.
But round children are so much easier to control and fun to watch in hilly areas. And they bounce! Of course they whine and bitch alot but then you can just hand them another twinkie.
Dan: You’re in the UK, and the societal views on children follow the metric system. Instead of Full, Crescent and New, it works out to Round, Less Round, Blank.
G3T: Abuse is my middle name. Safe Abuse Tinspector.
DaveCat:Yes, beefs.
Jagd:Hmm…. not sure where the WV went. I didn’t tell it to go away. I’ll leave it off until such time as I get spammed.
Rayne:Yes! Just like the blueberry girl from the original Willy Wonka movie. Loved that one!
Hey!@! plagiarizer(sp?)! Is that the right word?
You think you are so funny! Ha ha! __________-insert politically correct epithet____________-in politically correct orifice.
whoops!
well, it seemed funny last night.
l>t: *Sniff!* S’not plagiarism if I wrote it myself to begin with.
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